This is a kid or teenager hearing curses and swear words while having an MRI scan. When you hear these curses, these evil swears, your brain releases tons and tons of endolphins that make you stop getting good grades and visiting your dear old grandmother every Sunday after church.
*PLEASE TELL YOUR CHURCH PASTOR IF YOU HEAR THESE SWEARS AND CURSES*
SEVEN things to say people who want you to use curse words:
1) Dang, why the frick would I wanna say those you goof
2) Let’s go get a summer job and attend church camp instead of using curses and swears.
3) No, my Father said I could not, and I respect the rules of my Father’s house.
4) No thanks—I’d rather get into Heaven!
5) My cousin used curses and also swears, and he failed out of school and went to prison.
6) Curses are for warlocks, dude.
7) Sure, I will swear—I swear I’ll NEVER use curses or swear words!
you don’t need swears or curses to have a fun time!
Our original pastor used to swear.
He was the best damn priest our church will ever have.
Kid or teenager
See people, this is why you don’t try to use science to back up religious arguments. You will more often than not be grasping for straws. Not to say that religion is bad or anything, just that this argument makes no sense.
THIS IS THE FUCKING WALKING DEAD TS19 That’s Test Subject 19, and they are dying from the Zombie Plague. Fuck Me Running. IT SAYS AMC IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT CORNER!!!
lol they fucking spelled “endorphins wrong. dumbass. (Yes, I am cursing ironically) The fuck is an “endolphin”? Dolphin related brain hormones?
Endolphins cause the happy feelings you have when you see sea animals at play.
(Also, I really really hope that first person was trolling.)
You’ve no idea how many actual sermons I’ve heard like this.
I PROBABLY shouldn’t be doing this, but it popped up on my Facebook feed and, well, hm. I raged. In sharing this, should feminist/social justice/egalitarian Tumblrers take an interest it will probably just cause more unnecessary rage.
On the other hand, some people enjoy getting angry at things every once in a while. Who am I to refuse them another such opportunity to do so?
(Source: nirvves, via great-collapsing-hrung-disaster)
The spirit of God is inerrant; people—even those impassioned by the conviction that God is speaking directly to or through them—are not.
SALSU 40-day challenge
There’s some Jesus/spiritual thing someone invited me to on Tumblr for some reason. I highly doubt I’m going to go through with it because it is 40-days long but my offhand participation might be good food for thought. It’s not a subject I consider at length all too often. Rage below.
So there’s this movie about gay Adventists. You should watch it because of reasons.
During the movie someone quoted the Bible text “You shall not lie with a man as one lies with a woman” from the book of IforgotbutprobablyLeviticus. But, assuming that’s a reasonably accurate translation, isn’t that sort of physiologically impossible? Because as I understand it, to “lie with a woman” means vaginal intercourse. Which you can’t do with two dudes as neither of them possess a very significant attribute for that activity. MMMmmmm….sophistry.
No seriously though it’s rather thought-provoking and you could relate most of it to Christianity as a whole, not just Adventism. But you might not get the haystacks references though.
don’t mind me, just ranting
Pet Peeve: those trite messages and sentiments about how people are starving/freezing/suffering from curable diseases in (insert third-world country here) and how all of our problems by comparison are not worth complaining about.
Example: ” Be happy to be worried/sad about more complicated problems: school, relationships, deadlines,family,complicated situations, hard life story, money, depression because there are problems more worse but simple that other people have to worry about. FOOD, SHELTER, And a NEED for GOD! ”
It doesn’t bother me because that message is untrue. Some of us take shelter and food for granted and need to learn some perspective. There are people out there who suffer more than I can possibly imagine. However, the latest message I came across mentioned things like depression and hard life stories being things that we should be grateful for in comparison.
If you firmly agree with the above, I’d like you to try something for me. I’d like for you to find the nearest clinically-depressed person you have access to and tell them that their medically-recognized problem is a luxury and they should just get over it because they have a roof over their heads and food to eat. I suspect that afterwards you will not have access to clinically-depressed people.
And while you’re at it, find someone who was raised in an abusive home and tell them that they should be grateful for having a home to be abused in. Tell them that having abusive parents is better than having no parents at all. I suspect that the person you tell that to will never be your friend.
My problem with those trite, pithy little messages is that they group problems into two ill-defined and overgeneralized categories: REAL problems (starvation, no housing, AIDS) from trivial first-world problems (everything else). And that’s a callous and ignorant way to distinguish problems. And I’m uncomfortable with the possibility that some people actually see things this way.
I don’t have a personal problem with anyone I know who echoes those statements. They’re very affirming for those doing mission work, and remind people of the bigger picture and a world of problems outside of themselves.
But for those of you who do, ask yourselves who you are speaking to when you say it, and why. Because if you are speaking it to complacent, entitled, spoiled people, that’s one thing. But if that message reaches someone with a serious problem in their life that doesn’t neatly fall under the categories of “food, shelter, real diseases not psychological ones” then what is that you’re telling them? Not only that, if you bring God into it, then what are you telling people about God and whatever Christian denomination you affiliate yourself with?
Am I to believe that God and Christians only concern themselves with the most basic materialistic problems? Is that all we are to expect? If I make it to heaven, will food and a house and penicillin be all there is to greet me? Is that all God cares about? Because Christians and the Church have mentioned several times that is all they concern themselves with.
If I break a finger and someone else gets their arm chopped off, does the discrepancy between the two injuries mean that I in fact am perfectly healthy? No. So by all means prioritize those who need help with the more basic survival things. But why would you try to invalidate all other issues in order to do so? Pain is pain.
I mean, if God actually, obviously answered my prayers, what would they sound like? “God, so my dog died today.” “Big deal. Children are being born with AIDS.”
“God, someone stole my identity online and now I’m in massive debt.” “Do you know how many people in the world don’t have the Internet? I bet they’d be annoyed at your petty problems if they weren’t too busy starving to death.”
“God, turns out the man who married my mother is overcontrolling, bad with money, and borderline-abusive.” “Some children don’t grow up with their fathers around. While a war is happening.” I’d like to believe that God is better than that, even if there are verses in the Bible that point out otherwise. And maybe the people who post up those things never intended me or anyone else to get that impression about them or God. But there are people who hurt enough, who are angry enough, who suffer enough, and it’s not hard at all to take such a message that way. I know because a little bit of me feels tempted to.
And no, I’m not overreacting off of one random message I saw on some social networking site or other. I recall a fully-ordained pastor of a Church saying in a prayer that in light of a natural disaster in a third-world country, that everyone in the church had nothing to complain about. I think he’s wrong.
Because if you give people money and the means to clothe and shelter themselves, is that it? Is that what God is satisfied with? Take a look at developing countries around you and you will see that there has to be more than that (cough*Dubaiforinstance*cough). You don’t just go up to people who have a good job and tell them “there you go, now stop whining about unimportant crap”. God and anyone who follows him should care more than that. There’s more to a person’s wellbeing than life and death. There’s also living. And that’s something you shouldn’t ignore or dismiss no matter who tells you to.
The Reason Demon
I think that blind faith is often dangerously overhyped. Like you get pastors and whatnot telling stories about how “And Little Billy had EVERY reason to believe that no one in the building, not even his Mommy and Daddy who loved him oh so very much, had the means to disable the neutron bomb that the space gangsters had implanted in his brain to assassinate the Mayor of Earth. But he prayed, and he prayed, and when everyone was obediently kneeling down with their hands folded and their eyes closed, a little possum walked in unnoticed, and right when the prayer ended the possum burped up the remote control for the bomb. Billy quickly said “Praise the Lord!” as he hit the “Abort” button, and then everyone lived happily ever after, except for the space gangsters. For their crimes of putting bombs into the brains of innocent children and the corresponding kill-switches into innocent possums, they were sentenced to 20 years in space-jail. But space-jail was a euphemism for ‘a freaking black hole’ so instead of doing time, they’re witnessing cosmic events in reverse while simultaneously being compressed into singularity by gravitational forces of a magnitude beyond the ability of humans to calculate, let alone comprehend. And then the Mayor of Earth gave Little Billy a medal for his heroism which could summon a real live T-rex Cyborg and then Little Billy called it and named it ‘Octavius’ and then rode it into the sunset.”
Wait, I’m sorry, every time I try to emulate a stereotypical and uninspired children’s story I end up making something too awesome to actually exist. But I’ve come across numerous examples where “the power of faith and absolutely nothing else especially not human effort for material change” has been glorified in stories and sermons, to the point where some people are inspired to do exactly that instead of taking some kind of positive, objectively-measurable beneficial action even when they are able to do so, because that would undermine their faith in God’s abilities, or something.
Which is kind of dumb, honestly. That’s like war veterans calling all the men of newer, warless-generations pansies because they didn’t spend years in a POW camp or get a limb incinerated and THEN shot-off by .50 cal machinegun rounds. Understandably, nothing can compare in manliness to either of the two examples, but if you don’t throw in a disclaimer or give examples of how to be courageous in less extreme contexts, you’re going to have some people throwing themselves at the closest thing to a battlefield-scenario as they can get just to prove themselves or feel like they are accomplishing something. Which isn’t a good idea unless you believe that world peace has no place in existence.
It’s like some people, in their need to feel devout, willingly and needlessly eschew sensible decisions when confronted with problems to prove how faithful they are. Which is some of the worse kind of overzealous tunnel-vision I’ve ever encountered. Do those people have any idea how much needless suffering they propagate by choosing to act that way? Of course not. You can’t quantify suffering. Which is why they have no idea that they are doing it. And even if they get that vibe, they think they’re doing the right thing. Which is the most awful, perverse part about it all. I don’t claim to know much about God or Satan or Cthulu or Scientology Jesus, but that seems like the sort of thing that Satan would have a spiteful chuckle over while twirling his devil-stache.
I don’t really have a solution to this. Maybe a disclaimer or something. I just want devout people to not forget that we invented medicine and (relative) gender equality and smart phones and Sun Chips. And maybe some of these great achievements mean we have better options to improve our situation and that it isn’t against God’s will to choose those options instead of ignoring them in favor of just praying a lot more. Honestly, if that’s what you feel it takes to be pious, go join a freaking monastary and subside off of nothing but prayer, breadcrust, charity, and self-flagellation. At least medieval monks were isolated where they couldn’t hurt anyone else with their selfishness. I realize I’m making a blanket statement here and that I (hopefully) am not accurately describing the majority of pious Christians. But I know a few who are like that, and the suffering that those few cause is enough to concern me.
tl;dr “It’s one thing to admire blind faith, another to think that gouging out your own eyes while praying is the best course of action in any given situation as a result.”